Over the years, it has become en vogue to tell someone of an unpopular opinion that that they are ‘phobic’ or ‘shaming’.
There is ‘Christos-shaming’ where Christians are vilified and/or people try to ‘shame’ them for their beliefs. There is ‘creation-shaming’ where Christians are shamed for believing in creation over evolution. Some are even shamed by other Christians for making efforts toward living a pure life and adhering to scripture.
It seems that for every person who likes something, there is someone else who does not. This unhappy person will spend way too much energy trying to ‘shame’ you for just living a life that brings you joy. The people who shame other people for what they enjoy doing might be hiding a narcissistic personality disorder since they just LOVE telling other people what they should and should not enjoy doing… but I’m no expert of disorders, and that is not what this post is about.
This post is about fat shaming, and yes, FIT shaming. I have seen people shame other people on social media for wanting to preserve the hard work they have put into working out and being fit rather than observing religious fasting.
There are many ways to observe religious fasting. One of those other ways of observing a religious fast is by keeping control of your mouth. We must guarding what comes out of our mouths and now with social media, what comes out of our keyboards. If you keep a strict fast but go around condemning others, mocking them, criticizing and judging them, you have erased ALL of your efforts you would have gained by fasting. Poof! They are completely gone.
I chose to write about the topic of shaming because as you embark upon your wellness journey, you will encounter opposition. Not as much from enemies as you might think, but more so from friends… or rather people you thought were your friend until you chose to make some changes in your life that make them feel challenged or left behind.
A more well known example of fit shaming is what happened to the singer, Adele. Adele was ‘fit’ shamed by disloyal ‘fans’ when she chose to go on her own wellness journey and drop over 100 pounds. No matter how devoted a fan you are/were, Adele owes you nothing. No one ‘owes’ you anything. It is not Adele’s job to make sure you have a fat role model to help you feel good about yourself and you do not owe it to anyone to remain fat so that they do not feel bad about themselves.
Years ago there was a Christian ministry that helped certain males overcome their certain ‘issues’- should they WANT to try and come out of that lifestyle. However, because some people thought, erroneously (there are plenty of studies done to back up the fact that certain proclivities are chosen and can be overcome) that people could never NOT be THAT… that the institution should be closed down thus removing forever (unless people chose to try and self heal) a place that offered an alternative to their alternative. EVERYONE was denied the chance to change by going to that institution because a few people thought it was wrong for them to try and do so. A minor number of people decided something for others with no regard for their wishes, and THAT is a travesty.
I do wonder if we will be like that one day soon about gyms and fitness. Although ‘fitness’; gyms, supplements, surgeries, equipment, etc., is a multi-billion dollar industry, I can see it being attacked and gyms shutting down all over the country because some snowflake somewhere got a ‘butt hurt’ because they want everyone to ‘own it’… to accept their bodies how they are and never ever try to improve them by losing weight. One person deciding everything for everyone else is not a democracy. No mandate is part of a democracy.
Folks, there are certain things that are just not healthy for us and being 100+ pounds over weight is one of them.
What then IS fat shaming if encouraging people to live a healthy, fit life is not shameful?
Fat shaming is; name calling, teasing, belittling, bullying, mocking, condemning, etc. a person who is fat, obese, or overweight to a certain degree. yes, when children tear one another apart with words over their appearance it is a horrible thing and should not be tolerated. Deciding to lose weight because you get winded walking across your house is nothing to be ashamed about and you do not owe it to anyone to remain obese. Did you ‘get’ that.
Do you know why it is ok for you to lose weight and not stay fat/obese for other people? Because NO ONE OWNS YOU!
The reason why it is important to talk about such things is because there are too many people in the world with messed up lives and control issues who are determined to try and manipulate and control the rest of us. Some of them are just scared your changes will lead to you leaving them. A legitimate concern for some people. Some of them will hate you for changing because you did not seek them out before you began your journey. These people think you must consult them, seek their approval and when you do not, they are offended and may even ridicule your efforts and dreams of change.
I tell you these things not to scare you off, but to try and prepare you for what might be coming when you embark upon your journey. Do not allow these people to get in your way. Your health, and well being, is far more important than the feelings, and opinions on how you should live your life, of other people who cannot even cheer you on toward victory.
People who may themselves be in need of a wellness journey of their own.
It is disgusting how other people try to destroy the lives of those around them. You just keep putting one foot in front of the other and do not look back.